


What Could Have Been

by Ithiel_Dragon



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, M/M, Romance, Sleepy Cuddles, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2019-05-10 09:41:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14734562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ithiel_Dragon/pseuds/Ithiel_Dragon
Summary: Sharing one tent with three other men in the middle of the Leide desert is difficult.  It's even more difficult considering Noctis is hopelessly in love with one of them, and as the heir to the Lucien throne, expressing those feelings is forbidden.





	What Could Have Been

The Leide region was definitely low on his favorite places to visit.  It didn’t help that Noctis couldn’t completely forget the unpleasant memory of pushing the Regalia for _miles_ along the desert road until finally literally collapsing in exhaustion once they’d reached Hammerhead.  It was always hot here. Well, except at night when it was _freezing_ .  The countryside was swarming with giant scorpions, and whenever they spent too much time in the area, sand always seemed to end up _everywhere_ .  And he really meant _everywhere_ . He was going to find sand in his underwear for weeks after this. 

But the Regalia had broken down (again) because of something Prompto did (again) and Iggy had banned the younger man from ever touching anything in the car ever again (again) so they’d been forced to call the only mechanic they knew.  Cindy. The saint that she was, she’d towed the Regalia all the way back to Hammerhead and started to work on it right away. Only problem, it would take several days to get the parts she needed and the work completed. Which meant they were stuck in the desert (again) until it was finished. 

They spent most of the day taking odd jobs to help pay for the repairs, which meant a lot of time running around in the intense heat of the desert (and getting sand everywhere) much to Noctis’ displeasure.  In order to save money, they spent the nights camping. Which wasn’t all that out of the ordinary, but Noctis was definitely looking forward to their next motel room and a scalding hot shower to wash off the grime. 

The sun was setting now, so at least it was somewhat comfortable at the moment.  No longer the blistering heat of the day, but the chill of night hadn’t set in yet either.  Noctis was exhausted, his entire body ached, and he had sand in his underwear (again). He was currently sprawled in one of the folding chairs, watching while Ignis prepared their dinner.  Another new recipe the man had thought up with some ingredients they’d managed to scrounge up from the area. It smelled good, whatever it was. It was a little amazing, really, the man could make a meal out of practically anything.  Noctis stomach growled in anticipation.

Prompto was buzzing around Ignis, attempting to be helpful, his energy apparently boundless even in the hot Leide desert.  Noctis felt even more exhausted just watching him.

The sound of a boot scraping against stone towards his right had Noctis turning his head enough to watch Gladio make his way up the path to the haven with an armful of brush and sticks they could use to build a fire tonight.  The man was just as sweaty and gross as the rest of them. His hair greasy and his skin streaked with dirt and probably a bit of blood from the monsters they’d been hunting earlier. Yet somehow, Gladio could make even utterly filthy look good. 

Noctis watched the man through hooded eyelashes as Gladio dropped his load down beside the unlit fire pit. He sighed, stretched, then lifted the bottom of his shirt to wipe some of the sweat off of his face, even though it did little good.  But Noctis certainly wasn't complaining as it it gave him a splendid view of the older man’s stomach and hip bones. The tight leather trousers riding low enough to almost be obscene…

When Gladio crouched down, the leather pulling even tighter around his crotch and ass, Noctis forced his eyes away and shifted uncomfortably in his chair.  Gods he was… gorgeous… and that was definitely _not_ something Noctis should be thinking.  For so many reasons. Gladio was his friend.  Gladio was his Shield. Noctis was the future king of Lucius. Noctis was supposed to be _married_ in a matter of days.  And yet…

Noctis found his eyes drawn back to the older man, almost against his will, and was met with an intense amber stare.  His breath hitched in his throat when their gazes locked and Noctis swallowed hard. It felt like he was swallowing sand.  It felt like Gladio could read every inappropriate thought he was having on his face. Noctis could probably blame his blush on the heat, but he couldn’t so easily explain away the growing bulge in his pants.  He looked away again and crossed his legs, shame filling him.

It wasn’t like Gladio didn’t know… Noctis was terrible at hiding anything from his friends. Though they had all, by unspoken agreement, decided to ignore the enormous elephant in the Citadel.  That Noctis, prince and heir to the Lucien throne, was gay (or at least bi leaning heavily towards men) and was hopelessly attracted to one of his closest friends and bodyguard.  Had been for years.

Noctis had been something of a late bloomer.  While other fourteen and fifteen year old boys in his class had been constantly going on about the girls (and sometimes boys) they thought were ‘cute’ or ‘hot’ Noctis had never really saw the point.  It wasn’t until Noctis was sixteen that he began to realize that when he looked at the then nineteen year old Gladio, tall and broad, and quickly gaining muscle mass from his training with the other Glaives, it wasn’t just because he was envious of the older boy’s physique. That when they grappled during training and Noctis’ body would flush, his groin tightening embarrassingly, it wasn’t just because of runaway teenage hormones. That when he caught a glimpse of Gladio naked in the gym showers and Noctis would later dream about how the warm water seemed to caress his shoulders, chest, thighs, ass, he'd wish he could do the same…

At eighteen, during one of the rare private dinners he and Regis shared every now and then, he’d told his father he was gay.  Regis had not seemed surprised, but Noctis remembered how… sadly his father had looked at him. Noctis hadn’t dared to tell his father exactly _whom_ he was attracted to.  Too afraid his father would send Gladio away rather than risk allowing temptation to remain so close.  They had never spoke of it again. Even then Noctis knew he could never… express his growing feelings for his Shield. 

It probably wouldn’t have been so bad if it had stopped at only attraction.  But it was more than that. More than lust or a mere crush. Noctis wasn’t exactly sure when friendship and trust had grown into love but… as much as he tried not to, it had happened anyway…. and Noctis could never tell him. 

He was certain Gladio knew anyway.  Sometimes he swore he could see that same sad look in his Shield’s eyes that had been in his father’s and… he couldn’t stand it.  If it was just pity, it probably would have only pissed Noctis off. But it wasn’t pity. It was something else, and Noctis tried not to examine what it could be too closely, because it was hard enough as it was, without wondering if Gladio might be feeling the same kind of longing he did. 

“Hey, Noct,” Gladio’s voice pulled him from his brooding and he tilted his head to look at the older man with a raised eyebrow, “How about you get off your skinny ass and help for a change?”

The words were teasing rather than sharp, but they still made Noctis frown.  In response Noctis sent a small amount of fire magic towards the pile of sticks Gladio had just finished arranging in the pit.  Though even that small amount of magic was a bit of an overkill in this situation, and as the fire blazed to life Gladio was forced to dance away to keep from being singed.  Prompto laughed and Noctis heard the snap of his camera.

“Nice footwork there, big guy,” Prompto teased, and received the middle finger from Gladio.  The blonde man merely grinned and snapped another picture, which led to Gladio chasing Prompto around the camp trying to grab the camera from him.  How they could all still have so much energy after the day was really astounding to Noct who watched in amusement for a while, but he could quickly feel his eyelids drooping. 

The feeling of a warm hand grasping his shoulder lightly pulled Noctis back from the edge of sleep, but only just.  His adviser smiled at him and handed him a steaming bowl of food.

“Try to eat a little before you pass out?” Ignis asked, and Noctis nodded as he took up the spoon.  The food was just as delicious as he thought it would be, but even that couldn’t stop his eyelids from growing heavier by the minute.  Noctis only managed to eat about half of his dinner before his head began to loll back, and his lips parted with soft snores, as the spoon hung from his limp fingers. 

* * *

 

Noctis wasn’t sure how much time had passed.  Long enough for the sun to have set completely below the horizon and a chill to fill the air despite the crackling fire not too far away.  Noctis shivered slightly, curling up a little more in the chair to conserve warmth, and somehow managed not to tip it over in the process.

He heard someone snort softly in amusement close by.  Then felt an arm slip behind his back, another went under his knees, and he was being lifted into a warm embrace. Noctis sighed and curled into the other's broad chest. The steady thump thump thump of the heartbeat beneath his ear was soothing and he found himself relaxing even more into the other man.

“Such a spoiled brat,” a deep voice complained softly, though not without affection, “Should drop him on his ass, that will wake him up.”

“Don’t you dare, Gladio,” Ignis scolded, though his voice was pitched low.  They probably thought he was still asleep.

“Quit being a mother hen, Iggy.  You know I wouldn’t,” Gladio replied.  Not that Noctis had been worried. He knew Gladio would never do anything that would actually possibly hurt him.  Aside from kicking his ass in training, but even then the worst Noctis ever walked away with was a few mild bruises. 

Course if his Shield knew he was actually awake, he might drop him just to prove a point, so Noctis kept his eyes closed and his breathing even as the older man carried him the short distance to the tent.  He could hear Prompto already snoring on the other side of the tent as Gladio put him down on his sleeping bag with surprising gentleness. A moment later, he felt someone undoing the laces on his boots and tugging them off.  He wasn’t sure if it was Gladio or Iggy but he didn’t dare open his eyes to find out.

His covers were tucked around him and he felt the barest touch of warm fingers brushing a few stray strands of hair out of his face.

“Gladio…” Ignis’ voice was soft and chiding, though not without sympathy.  Gladio heaved a heavy sigh before responding.

“I know,” and the touch disappeared. 

Noctis’ heart ached as he listened to the two men settle down in their own sleeping bags.  Ignis on one side of him, and Gladio on the other. Each man acting as a literal shield between Noctis and the world outside should anything possibly disturb them during the night.  After a short time, he heard Iggy’s breath even out, signalling that his adviser had gone to sleep.

Noctis shivered, still feeling chilled despite the warmth of his blankets surrounding him.  Or maybe it was just the absence of warmth from his Shield’s arms he’d all too easily become accustomed to.  Exhaustion made him bold, and he slowly rolled closer to Gladio’s body, trying to make it seem he was simply shifting in his sleep.  It didn’t take much, since there wasn’t that much spare space in the tent with the four of them. He sighed softly as he tucked his head underneath the older man’s chin, pressing his face close to Gladio’s warm chest. 

At first there was no reaction from the other man, and Noctis figured Gladio must have already fallen asleep.  But after a long moment, he felt Gladio shift and then a strong arm circled around him, tucking him in even closer. Noctis wasn’t about to complain, and let out a small pleasant sigh as he soaked in the warmth of the older man’s body wrapped around him like a blanket. 

He felt Gladio’s breath puff into his ear when the older man sighed heavily.

“I know you’re awake,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.  Noctis tensed, sure he was going to be pushed away now, but the gentle squeeze the arm around him gave allayed those fears. 

“How long?” Noctis asked, and Gladio snorted softly in amusement.

“From the beginning.  You suck at playing dead,” the older man teased, and Noctis responded by digging his elbow into Gladio’s stomach making his shield grunt in discomfort.  Gladio ran his hand slowly down the length of Noctis’ back and he felt himself melting against the older man’s body in spite of himself. He usually hated it whenever anyone touched his back.  The old wound still caused Noctis discomfort sometimes, and it seemed Gladio was the only one who could touch him there and make it feel good rather than uncomfortable.

“Did Ignis know?” Noctis eventually asked softly, his fingers tracing small patterns lightly on the skin just below Gladio’s collar bone. 

“Hmm… probably,” Gladio replied, and Noctis wondered what that meant.  That neither man had called him out on it. That Gladio was still holding him, touching him, now even that they both knew he was awake. 

Noctis slowly lifted his head.  It was too dark to see Gladio’s face, but he could feel his breath, warm against the sensitive skin of his lips.  It wouldn’t take much to close that distance and kiss him…

“Gladio…” he whispered, started to lean in...

“Don’t,” Gladio’s soft voice made him freeze instantly. 

“Why?” he asked, even though he already knew the answer.

“Because… I’m not strong enough to stop you if you do…” the older man replied, and it definitely wasn’t what he was expecting to hear.  Noctis’ heart soared and plummeted in quick succession, making him feel dizzy and his throat tight with emotion.

A large hand cupped the back of his head, sliding through his hair tenderly, and guided his head back down.  He buried his face once more against the older man’s chest, and Gladio’s chin rested comfortably on top of his head.  Noctis’ breath hitched in his throat.

“I’m sorry…” he whispered brokenly. 

“It’s okay… just… go to sleep…” Gladio replied, his fingers moving slowly through Noctis’ hair and down the back of his neck.  Noctis closed his eyes and eventually fell asleep to the feeling of Gladio’s fingers petting him gently. He knew in the morning when he woke up, Gladio would probably already be gone from the tent.  That they would have to act as though this had never happened.

But for the moment, Noctis could dream of what could have been. 


End file.
